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Lottery Agents Run Out of Tickets Because of Evolution Convention

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Wednesday, June 20, 2007 8:18:04 AM
From the JP newswire:

For the first time in New York Lottery history lottery agents had to stop selling tickets because they ran out of blank tickets due to unexpected demand. Agents in Elmira were overwhelmed when participants at a convention supporting Evolution realized that the odds of winning the lottery were much higher than the odds of their own existence by evolutionary forces and began investing their life savings in lottery tickets. Te New York Lottery Commission responded quickly to the situation by sending a van with blank tickets to resupply the agents, but the surge in demand had ended when the conventioneers departed at the end of the conference. No effect is expected on other lotteries due to the small number of attendees at the convention, and their geographic distribution. None of the tickets sold in the flurry won enough money to require registration with the New York Lottery.
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Important Things Must Be Put to a Vote

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Friday, March 09, 2007 2:01:24 PM
While the spineless Big Labor sops in the House gladly passed a bill that would allow workers to become union members without a secret ballot, the union contract for teachers in San Diego guarantees that they will get to have a secret ballot vote on a highly critical issue - changes to the teacher dress code. I'm so glad that San Diego teachers can't be forced to wear a tie without getting to vote on it while workers in San Diego businesses could be forced to join a union without the opportunity to express their wishes via secret ballot.
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Kelo for People - aka "The Draft"

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Monday, November 27, 2006 12:54:07 PM
A caller to Bill Bennett's show this morning made a very insightful observation as to why Liberals would be the ones talking about bringing back the draft.  Liberals have a predisposition to believe that the government should take whatever it "needs" by compulsion.  Want money, raise taxes.  Want property, use eminent domain.  Want soldiers, reinstate the draft.

Conservatives tend to prefer for the government to use either purchase or persuasion to get what it wants. Need more soldiers? The Conservative approach is to make being a soldier more attractive through benefits and emphasize the honor of serving your country.

This is a fundamental difference between Liberals and Conservatives.  It exposes the core beliefs of the two groups.  Liberals belove that the people are stupid and need someone to take control of, I mean care of, them.  Conservatives belove in that people are inherently capable of understanding, and choosing, what is in their own best interest.

Nerdus

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The Democrats Are Not Corrupt In Every Sense

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Monday, November 20, 2006 5:42:10 PM
One of the senses of the word "corrupt" is that something has been changed, in a bad way, from its original state. Murtha for Majority Leader? Alcee Hastings for Chairman of the Intelligence Committee? Moves like that force one to question if the state of the Democrats in the House represents a debasement from where they once were, or just them in their natural state.

Nerdus

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Can we change all lawmakers' titles to "Nanny"?

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Friday, November 17, 2006 2:05:25 PM
The Heart Attack Grill, an apparent Hooters knock-off in Tempe AZ, is in a little trouble with the nanny state.  It seems it is illegal for them to call their scantily clad waitresses "nurses".  A law to prevent unscrupulous people from using the title "nurse" to trick people into believing that they are a medical professional is a good thing.  The problem is when you think anyone is stupid enough to think a half naked waitress is a medical professional.  While I have often wondered why intelligent people would go to Hooters, I might stop in at this place in the unlikely event that I am ever in Tempe.  The sheer campiness of "Double-Bypass Burgers" and "Flat-liner Fries" deserves a little leeway, both in my standards for restaurant decorum and nanny-state enforcement of obviously inapplicable laws.  Plus, I rather like the blues version of their theme song.  Can we just change the titles of all intrusive lawmakers and functionaries to "Nanny"?

 Nerdus

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The Irony of It All: Stuck Without a Plan

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Friday, November 10, 2006 12:03:41 PM
Isn't it wonderfully rich irony that the Democrats ran a campaign based on "Bush is stuck in Iraq without a plan." that has resulted in them being stuck in Washington without a plan?

Nerdus

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Build Your Own Bias Detector - Part Two

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:06:00 PM
Today we install the Colorometer (Colourometer if you are British) in our bias detector. The colorometer performs a very important function. It scans human communication much like an astronomer uses a spectrometer to scan the stars. What both tell us is what colors are there, and which are missing. An example will help us understand the function of, and need for, a colorometer in our bias detector.

I could, quite accurately, describe the beginnings of my daughter's relationship with her husband by saying that they first met at a movie theater and had their fist extended conversation at a run down night club that was later shut down and demolished. Quite the lurid portrait of hedonistic young people, isn't it?

I could equally accurately  describe this by saying that they first met at a church service and had their first extended conversation at a church event for young adults. That leaves quite a different impression.

Either impression is deepened if you include the fact that he is employed by a church. In the first case it adds the whiff of hypocrisy to the odor of  hedonism.  To the second it adds a hint of commitment to a fragrance of wholesomeness.  Both accounts are factually accurate, but the first could leave a very innaccurate impression.

 We found in part one that not being able to report everything creates an opening for bias in choosing what to report.  A second opening for bias occurs because you can't report everything about anything.  We color any report we make when we, as we must, choose which details to include.  This inescapable coloring is why your bias detector needs a colorometer.

The reporting of Pope Bendict's address at Regensburg is an example of coloration.  Most of the speech was about "reason" as defined by the classical Greek philosophers versus modern philosophers.  What most reporters chose to report about it was a centuries old quotation that happened to refer to Muslims.  In the context of the address any group known to  use violence to spread its point of view would have done just as well,  so the Muslim aspect of the quotation wasn't even the most enlightening fact in understanding what was being said.  It was, however, what got reported.  That is coloration.

Another classic example of coloration by reporting selective facts is the reporting of Dick Cheney's finances.   Search for reports touching on this topic and you will find many articles that mention how much money he has made, but very few that mention how much he has given to non-political charities.  I suspect that how much someone gives to which causes tells you more about their character than does how much they made and how they made it.

The importance to detecting bias of what details are, and are not, included in a report makes the colorometer an essential component in your bias detector.

Nerdus

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Sayings of Confusion - Part Three

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Sunday, October 15, 2006 1:26:22 PM

Confusion is the leading wise man and philosopher of Canachinadia.  The following are from his list of things not to say to the bride at a wedding reception.

 

Great party! You should get married more often.

 

All the women seem to like to slow dance with your husband.

 

Did you invite all his ex-girlfriends?  I’ve met ten so far.

 

Does his mother always cut his meat for him?

 

Was he wearing his glasses when you met?

 

Nerdus

 

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Almost Too Good for One Day

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Friday, October 13, 2006 9:08:10 PM
Air America files Chapter 11 and it turns out that Harry Reid's son was likely on the commission that gave the very favorable zoning that made him so much money on land he didn't own.  Plenty of good news, but how many will hear?

Nerdus

 

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Sayings of Confusion - Part Two

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Sunday, October 08, 2006 12:36:03 PM

More of the sayings of Confusion, the famous Canachinadian philosopher.


Your mind and your bed have this in common, neither should be made up unless you are out of it.

Twelve is a good number of steps for a self-help program, but not for preparing a microwave dinner.

 

Nerdus

 

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Error Free Reporting?

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Saturday, October 07, 2006 10:17:58 AM
Drudge links to an article that includes a threat letter from law firm representing "the page" to the guy who identified him as "the page".  It contains the hilarious assertion that he shouldn't publish that association because he got it from ABC news, who everybody knows is not error free.  Doesn't that mean that we should all assume they are wrong about the veracity of the IMs and who sent them?

Nerdus

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"Trust, but Verify." and the Foley Mess

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Friday, October 06, 2006 12:35:42 PM
There is an interesting developing story on Drudge indicating that the Page who "captured" the instant messages has told other Pages that it was a prank.  This brings up a question I haven't seen addressed.  How do we know that these are actually what they are purported to be?  Instant messages are not saved by default, so they are not something that would just be lying around to be found.  Somebody has to take specific action to have them persist beyond the session.  Why would the Page do that and then sit on them so long? These things are ephemeral by nature.  Has anyone asked how it is that they have come to be preserved until this moment?

The messages are also just text and would be supremely easy to fake in a log file.  Has anybody done anything to verify that they are genuine?  Just looking at the text wouldn't be a dead giveaway like the Times New Roman proportional font on a National Guard Selectric typewriter that everyone but Dan Rather and Mary Mapes could have spotted from across the room.  Has anyone established the chain of custody?

There is little doubt from Foley's actions that he did not belong in congress.  Unlike Gerry Studds (Democratic House member who had a homosexual affair with an under age Page in the 80's and went on to be reelected several times with the full support of the Democratic House establishment), at least he resigned knowing that his (minor compared to Studds') actions would not be tolerated by his leadership.  Foley is a bad actor.  There is a lot of uncovered ground that could reveal a number of other bad actors if properly investigated.  I want to see some verification that these IMs are the real deal.
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10 Reasons Not to Feed the Cat to Your Dog

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Monday, October 02, 2006 5:36:01 PM
10. The cat does such a good job of making the dog look smart.

9. Nobody from PETA there to see it.

8. The dog already gets his minimum daily requirement of cat in that store brand dog food you buy him.

7. Any cat forced to live with a dog is in a constant state of abject terror.

6. You would have to clean up the mess afterwards.

5. Ozzie Osborn is scheduled to do a concert near you soon and says he has put a new twist into his act.

4. It violates the noise abatement ordinances in most communities.

3. Cats are high in saturated fats and cholesterol.

2. Friends don't let friends eat cat.

1. The wife.

Nerdus

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Build Your Own Bias Detector - Part One

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Saturday, September 30, 2006 3:02:58 PM
Bias and beauty must have a lot in common as both are in the eye of the beholder.  The Conservatives point out  liberal bias and the Liberals point out conservative bias.  I'll leave it to you to decide who makes the better case, but will offer some tools for verifying bias - yours or someone else's.

The most unavoidable and difficult to detect bias is in the decision on what to publish.  That is why your bias detector needs a Content Distribution Analyzer.
There is not enough time to cover everything, so an "editorial decision" has to be made about what is important enough to be published.  The conservative blogoshpere has many posts about Liberal media that cover anything negative about the President but nothing positive about what is happening in Iraq.  This is a reflection of a decision, conscious or unconscious, as to what is "important" enough to spend limited time and publishing bandwidth to cover.  Apparently I think understanding bias is "important".

What does it tell us when  we get a bias alarm from our Content Distribution Analyzer?  Mostly it tells us that anyone who spends all of their time on a single topic or point of view is likely to think that topic or viewpoint is "important", and others aren't.  This is a bias of omission.
 
It is wise to note, however, that we also make editorial decisions about what to read or watch.  One of the dangers of mega-multi-channel technology is that each of us can choose to hear only messages that agree with us.  So, go read a Liberal before the Content Distribution Analyzer goes off on you.

Nerdus

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Getting you know what at the pharmacy

Posted by Nerdus Maximus on Friday, September 29, 2006 10:37:26 PM
Today I went to CVS and had to go to the pharmacists' counter at the back of the store to get you know what.  Apparently they don't want just anyone getting you know what, so you have to ask the pharmacist.
When I was a kid, "you know what" would have been condoms.  Today they are out for anyone to pick up (and available in designer colors).  It is anything containing pseudoephedrine that you have to get from the pharmacist.  I understand that some security is needed since pseudoephedrine can be used as Crystal Meth Helper, but does that mean that every American with bad sinuses should be treated like a criminal?  I never thought I would have to be fingerprinted and pose for a picture with one of those nice little number plates to get an OTC medication to actually come over the counter.  OK, they just looked at my drivers license, wrote down enough vital information to make an identity thief drool and had me sign the "you might be a drug dealer" log.
The United States is becoming a backwards country.  Not in the sense of not having material wealth and modern technology, but because things work backwards.  Acquiring a simple medication requires showing your drivers license, but purchasing prophylactics to practice sexual license is completely unencumbered.

Nerdus

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